Save Our Xmas Sanity

Confessions of Reformed Bah-Humbugger

Who cares how many days there are till Christmas?

I certainly don't!

Firstly, because there'll always be some magazine, department store, or website to keep me informed!

Secondly, these days the onset of the pre-Christmas hype doesn't send me spinning into a haze of horror (and reaching for the gin bottle).   

What's Your First Reaction?

What happens for you when you first see

• Tinsel on the shelves in the supermarkets?
• Signs in the butcher reminding you to order your turkey/ham?
• Letterbox advertising and mail order catalogues with Christmas gift ideas and decorations?
• Signs and articles about the Creeping Proximity of Christmas?

Well I know that for me the usual reaction is dread! 

Dread, like when your innards feel like they're dropping down to your feet in a matter of seconds (and you're not going down in an elevator).

Dread, like when you were caught talking in line-up at school and got sent to the principal's office.  (Sister Silvester wielded a mean thin bamboo cane, I can tell you!)

Dread mixed with anger, like when you've forgotten something you promised yourself you'd remember.  (Like that endless promise you make to yourself that you'll Christmas shop at the sales during the year.  Doh!  I forgot AGAIN.)

Dread, like when you can see the car crash coming and can't AVOID it. 

And what do I do when the dread happens? 

Denial has always been a goody for me.  But of course, the longer you remain in denial the closer Christmas gets, and the more the internal anxiety builds.  Then suddenly it's the week before Christmas and the dam wall bursts and I'm overcome with tasks, tiredness, tears and terror.

I Hate To Gloat But ...

... NOT THIS YEAR!

I had my first sighting of Christmas the other day. (Hmm, thanks Karen)

And the familiar dread rushed in as it's learned to do over so many years.  And the panicky feeling started to rise in my chest.  That sick feeling lurched around my belly.  When suddenly (and terribly surprisingly) my BRAIN kicked in. 

What's Different?

I heard this cool, sooooooothing voice reminding me that I don't need to dread Christmas any more.  (No! I don't really hear VOICES, I'm not THAT bad.)  It was my own voice.  (Now that I'm a Christmas Calm Angel.) 

The voice?  It was some positive self-talk from my own little self-protecting angel reminding me that I now have new habits and new expectations about managing Christmas. 

You see I took a dose of my own medicine and worked my way through my OWN copy of Save Our Sanity, The Christmas Calm Manual.  I changed my thinking.  I changed my planning.  I gave denial a good kick up the backside.  I looked after myself with rewards for work well done, and plenty of destressing techniques.  And Christmas ran smoothly. And again last year!

So!  Now that I'm immunised against the effects of that familiar dread feeling, I'm ready to be YOUR Christmas Calm Angel. 

I know there are plenty of people like me out there, with their heads buried in the Sand of Denial and hoping for some Fairy to come and fix it!

Sound Familiar?

Well, our Christmas  Stress Test is still available and plenty of people have started taking the test. 

But if you know that you can't face another year of all that stress, then maybe it's time to think about getting your own copy of  Save Our Sanity: The Christmas Calm Manual. The Calm Manual is here to save you all, one frazzled woman at a time.

The countdown to Christmas 2008 has officially begun!

Can you believe that in less than 100 days it will be Christmas?

Apparently we crossed the 100-day line earlier this week...

How does that make you feel? We're no longer talking months to go, we're talking in days. Scary stuff for those who stress about Christmas.

Of course, that's not us. We're not stressed or scared by the approach of the silly season. Nah.

We're in total. denial.

Chris and I were talking earlier today, and as we made plans for SOS and counted up the days left in 2008,  we both recognised those physical changes that indicate a rise in stress levels - a faster heartbeat being the main indicator (without any strenuous housekeeping or dog walking as an excuse).

Of course, recognising that the mere mention of the approaching imminence of that day in December causes us stress is the very first step in healing and changing the outcome this year.

We want to be calm, in control and organised.

And it IS do-able.

Our Challenge to You

Set your intentions now.

How do you want to be for the next ninety-something days?

We're sure that you aren't putting your hand up and saying you want to be stressed... so what is it you DO want?

Peace, love and goodwill to all?

Calm and organised and feeling like you're in control, like us?

Joyful?

Relaxed?

Determined to have a simple, stress-free, laughter filled Christmas - and that means the whole lead up to it, as well as the day?

Please leave us a comment and let us know what your intention is. Write it down. Post it prominently. Say it aloud to yourself every day.

And don't forget to subscribe to our 'feed' to get all our hints and tips for a calm Christmas direct to your inbox or feedreader (that's it - up there in the top left hand corner of this page).

Save Our Sanity: The Christmas Calm Manual - designed specifically to help you sail into Christmas, stressless and chaos-free - buy now and get a head start on a Calm Christmas 2008!

Christmas Shopping Online

Last year, I did about a third of my Christmas gift shopping online. And it was so successful that this year I'm planning on doing way closer to all of it online. I really, really dislike crowds. And I hate the way people get when they are frazzled, stressed and strung out about getting their shopping done. The shopping malls become the things nightmares are made of.

So imagine my delight when I found a blog site dedicated to online Christmas shopping! It hasn't been going very long, but already I like what I am reading - this ones bookmarked for regular reading in the next couple of months. 

The Online Christmas Shopping Guide.

"Let’s face it. The holiday season can be riddled with stress and worry, especially when you haven’t properly alloted time for it. There’s the dilemma of having to attend too many office parties, the dread of in-laws showing up on your doorstep, or just a general worry over what must be prepared at home (to let your friends know your not Ebeneezer Scrooge). The one thing you can do to avoid adding to stress is online Christmas shopping because at least knowing your shopping is taken care of will free up enough time to prepare for the other items on your Xmas agenda!"

We like where they are coming from, don't you?

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Related posts:

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens... A few of our favourite things

When Santa gets stuck for ideas

Here's a quick way to get your Christmas gift giving handled

If we went back, would Christmas be less stressful?

In scanning the web for things to help our frazzled readers make life at Christmas easier, I found this interesting article. 

Linore Rose Burkard advocates a return to a more Regency-era Christmas. 

Some of her ideas seem to fit with our own suggestions of changing traditions that don't work, for simpler ones that can fill your lives with pleasures rather than stress. 

In the early part of the 19th century, the season of Christmas was more about
family and fun than gifts and giving. Sure, there was room for presents, and they did add to the fun, but they were just a small part. Focusing on the frenetic fifteen minutes or half hour of tearing into a pile of gifts is what gets us in trouble today. We spend an inordinate amount of time, money and energy preparing for that one *tiny* part of the holiday.

I'm not here to try and deprive you of that part of Christmas. It's still important. But I do want to help you with perspective, increasing the time spent in areas that will leave you feeling fulfilled and satisfied afterwards, not with the usual lament of All that effort--all that money--and they're still not happy!  [more]

See what you think.  In fact why not put in a comment and tell us what you think?

And were you aware that purchasers of Save Our Sanity:The Christmas Calm Manual get access to a special password-protected area of our site for extra exclusive resources? 

So maybe it is worth investing in the book and not just hoping for the best this Christmas!

When Santa gets stuck for ideas...

This is for all our American friends... we've been thinking of you, and realise that you have been sorely neglected in our Christmas shopping tips department.

Best Buy, the American electronics store, has two new initiatives for hassle-free Christmas shopping.

Wow Factor Finder - this is neat little gift suggestion generator - you answer a series of questions about your intended gift recipient, and it comes up with a list of very helpful suggestions (which you can then print out and take along to the nearest Best Buy store).  The recommendations aren't specific - like buy this game or this music or this MP3 player - they are general suggestions.  For example, I did a search for my 8-year-old son (the only gift I have left to sort...) and the Wow Factor Finder came up with a number of suggestions, including:

Robot Toys and Mechanical Pets

Robot toys and mechanical pets are among the hottest gift items for kids of every age. This generation of robotic toys combines technology and personality for autonomous behavior, multiple interaction levels and lifelike movements.

Here are some things to think about before purchasing a robot:

• Software: Be aware that some models include programming software for PCs and Macs, and may even be controllable from your cell phone using Bluetooth technology.

• Batteries: All robots require batteries, which are typically not included. Be sure to check the package so you can buy what you need. Lithium batteries are recommended for the high end robots.

This was only one of the suggestions... and since littleD has had a Roboraptor or a Robosapien on his list the last 2 years (gosh, darn, Santa never brought him one last year...) I can really see how this is a very appropriate recommendation.. (no guarantees it will be under the tree again THIS year, though).

photo credit: robosapienonline.com

There were even some Stocking Filler Suggestions to help Santa get his list sorted for those kids that he has left to the last minute...

I like how it doesn't recommend a particular brand, and gives some really helpful suggestions.  (This would even be helpful for people who cannot access/get delivery from a Best Buy shop, as the recommendations are so general!  Shhh, don't tell them I told you!!)

Ask A Blue Shirt - also a Best Buy initiative - a special chat event hosted by Best Buy employees (called Blue Shirts - cute) to help deranged shoppers consumers with any questions they may have about new items available this holiday season as well as to help shoppers determine how to Wow their loved ones with cool gifts that are right for them.  (Hey, isn't that what we all want?  All within the budget please...)

The chat takes place THIS FRIDAY - December 15th, at 1pm at www.askablueshirt.com - go to the website for details!

Great initiatives guys - THIS is what Christmas shopping should be like everywhere, don't you think?  With stores actually making it as easy as possible for us to satisfy the need to get the 'right' gift without all the anxiety that can go with that.

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens... A few...

of our Favourite Things...

... shopping sites on-line, actually :)

While Chris is busy planning her Christmas sitting on the couch with her SOXS Sanity Saver folder and pen in hand...(and trying to pin her hubby down for long enough to make some executive purchasing decisions), I've been busy finishing my shopping on-line.

And most of it arrived on my doorstep in the last couple of days!  Yahoo!!

I was talking with a friend this afternoon who was bemoaning the state of shopping centres - how people are grumpy and rude, how the hassle for parking really brings out the worst in people, and how negative she finds the whole Christmas shopping experience.  She said wouldn't it be wonderful if people were happy, and even went around singing Christmas carols as they shopped (can you IMAGINE it?)...

We agreed that shopping centres really are places to avoid from now until sometime in January.

I'm going to let you in on my secrets for finishing my Christmas shopping without setting foot in a shopping mall:

www.petersofkensington.com.au - oh boy, do I LOVE this site!  Not only is it easy to navigate, with a huge range of products for every taste, some at amazingly low prices, they also individually gift wrap each item you order over the value of $15 for free!  My first batch arrived yesterday, very well packaged, delivered to my door by the postman, beautifully gift wrapped, ready to pop under the tree.  What could be better?  I'm pretty sure you could also get them to deliver your gifts for you to most destinations in Australia.

www.sanity.com.au - for a great range of music and movies - at competitive prices delivered to your mail box fuss-free.  I love to give music as gifts, and my family this year had a few requests for unusual DVDs - I found them all on Sanity (not that I bought them all!), and I hadn't found any in the shopping centres.

www.experiencethis.com.au - for 'experience' gifts - including new Greater Union/Birch Carroll and Coyle gift cards - these cards come in various denominations from $30 to $150 and would be a brilliant gift for the movie lover in your life.  They can spend the value of the card at the cinemas in any way they want (movies, lollies, choc-top icecreams, champagne and Gold Class tickets...whatever!)  HINT: also great for staff gifts ;-)

www.lastminute.com.au - Chris told me about this site (no, I haven't actually purchased anything from here), but a quick review of the goodies here tells me this would be a good place to get some of your Christmas shopping sorted.

If you have any other favourite on-line shopping stores - especially our international readers who care to share - please leave a comment below, or send us an email to SaveXmas at gmail dot com and tell us why you are recommending them please.

There is still time to get your shopping sorted online - but don't leave it too late - some sites are citing delivery cannot be guaranteed if you order too close to Christmas, so check the individual sites for current delivery times and cut off dates.

An Australian Christmas Carol

When I was growing up, because we were a very musical family, there were always Christmas Carols. My Mother, who was heavily involved in an aged care home, used to come to school and teach my class carols that we would then go and sing to the 'old people'.  And whilst we always sang classics like Silent Night and Jingle Bells, my favourites were always the Aussie songs. 

Now, when I say Aussie Carols, they always involved heat and dust ... the song book my Mother had contained Carol of the Birds, Christmas Bush for His adorning, The Silver Stars are in the Sky, and The Three Drovers... just the names are enough to bring back the melodies and snatches of the words.

...and this is probably the most quintessentially Aussie song of them all... (I remember it being sung loud by Rolf Harris - it was written by him and John D Brown):

Six White Boomers

Early on one Christmas Day, a Joey Kangaroo,
Was far from home and lost in a great big zoo.
Mummy, where's my mummy, they've taken her a-way,
We'll help you find your mummy son, hop on the sleigh.

Chorus:
Six white boomers, snow white boomers,
Racing Santa Claus through the blazing sun.
Six white boomers, snow white boomers,
.. On his Aus-tra-lian run.

Verse: Up beside the bag of toys, little Joey hopped ,
But they hadn't gone far when Santa stopped.
Un-harnessed all the reindeer and Joey wondered why,
Then he heard a far off booming in the sky.

Chorus: Six white boomers ...

Pretty soon old Santa began to feel the heat,
Took his fur-lined boots off to cool his feet.
Into one popped Joey, feeling quite OK,
While those old man kangaroos kept pulling on the sleigh.

Chorus: Six white boomers ...

Joey said to Santa, Santa, what about the toys,
Aren't you giving some to these girls and boys.
They've all got their presents son, we were here last night,
This trip is an extra trip, Joey's special flight.

Chorus: Six white boomers ...

Soon the sleigh was flashing past, right over Marble Bar,
Slow down there, cried Santa, it can't be far.
Come up on my lap son, and have a look around,
There she is, that's mummy, bounding up and down.

Chorus: Six white boomers ...

Well that's the bestest Christmas treat that Joey ever had,
Curled up in mother's pouch all snug and glad.
The last they saw was Santa headed northward from the sun,
The only year the boomers worked a double run.

Chorus: Six white boomers ...

When you think of Christmas when you were a child, what tunes come back to you?  Can you hear a certain tune and be immediately transported back to that innocence where you eagerly awaited a visit from Santa? 

Now, more importantly, what memories are you creating for your children and grandchildren? 

Sanity Saving Christmas... hold the reindeer!

Week One of our five week special gift giveaway has zoomed past us, and it is time to draw the lucky winner.

Unfortunately Chris has been sidelined (or is that sideswiped?) for the last two weeks with a very nasty back complaint and is really in enforced no-sitting-at-the-computer time.  It's called rest!

Now, I know that's an alien concept to quite a few women out there (and more than a few men, too!), so I am going to be begging Chris to write about her experiences doing nothing at all, once she's back to doing something.

Anyway, the reason for me telling you this, is that is why the draw for this week's gift recipient hasnt happened yet.  It IS going to happen - I even have the SOXS Sanity Saver Kit sitting here beside me, all ready to go to the lucky winner!   

And remember - if you didn't purchase your copy of SOXS - Save Our Christmas Sanity last week, why not pop over and grab YOUR copy RIGHT NOW - that way you'll be in the draw for the extra-special SOXS Sanity Saver Kit early next week!

How to stay positive during the holidays

I'd like to share a post with you that I wrote last year (on November 24th, so a couple weeks later in the season that where we are right now...) about staying positive - and about having realistic expectations around the whole festive season.

Sometimes it's about looking at what you're expecting to do, to be, to have, to experience, and then realising that some of that is pure fantasy.  If you're not the perfect family any other time of year, why would you expect to be now?

If you have only a limited budget (and let's face it - who doesn't??) then why do you have this expectation about buying gifts for all?

And what about the beautiful, magazine-like home?  The 'perfectly' decorated house and tree and a yard that looks like it's been manicured?  Is it like this any other time of year?  So why do some of us expect to get it like that now, when we are at our busiest??

Not to mention all those other expectations, like losing 5 kilos in a week, looking tanned and we just stepped out of a day spa on Christmas day... along with serving the perfect meal, on the perfectly set table?? (Not to mention the perfectly behaved children...)

Of course, it's just a dream, isnt it?  Only these sorts of dreams can actually cloud our reality.  Making what we Do Have seem just that little lacking in some way.  It's time to take a good hard look at our expectations and see what we need to revise/lower/or ditch altogether.

Go and take a look at my post from last year, and Lucy Macdonald's post that inspired it...

Then please would you come back and tell us what you think?  Are your expectations of yourself and the whole festive season realistic, or just a dream in a bubble above your head?  After all, this is what  SOXS is all about!

To post or not to post

Another 'time to talk about mail' post.  Only this time, we have a question for you, dear reader.  Yup - YOU!

Do you prefer to get Christmas cards from all and sundry in your letterbox?  Or are you quite happy with an email?

We are very aware that there are schools of thought who are polar opposites on this issue.  There are those that say it isn't Christmas without the obligatory Christmas card in the mail from every friend, aquaintance, old school chum, ex-es and great-Aunt.  Well, maybe not the ex-es.

And there are those who are quite happy knowing that someone has thought about them long enough to send a few words from their keyboard to yours - or even one of those funny e-cards.

And, as Chris told me this afternoon when we debated discussed this, she has a friend who draws up a list and calls each person by phone in the lead up to Christmas (and has done so herself!!)

The debate is fuelled by what we have 'always done', what is 'expected' of us, and also by that demon - guilt!  What would great-aunt think if I didn't send that letter???

[Side note - on a recent trip interstate, my mother visited with my great-aunt & uncle... and Auntie happened to mention that she didn't receive the usual chatty family letter with photos from Karen last Christmas, like she usually did.  Oh dear - the guilt really got to me then - it must have been really important for her to remember all these months later!  I was extremely close to my Grandmother, and this is her younger sister - the closest thing to Grandma I have left.  I know I sent a card, just ran out of time to put the letter-with-photos-chronicle together last year.  Sigh... guess what's high on the list this year?]

Where was I?

Oh yes.  What would you prefer to receive?  Does that drive what you are going to send?

I've had years where I sat with my Christmas card list, and sent cards only in reply to cards I received, except for a few special ones.  Amazingly, this cut my list down by over 50%!  Obviously Great-Aunt was still on the list :)

All those people we never see - yet they live only around the corner... maybe it's time to stop sitting on the fence and either sever the ties completely, or give them a call and invite them over for a drink one Sunday afternoon.

We'd like to hear your thoughts on this debate.  Is it a matter of pride with you that you write beautiful chatty notes in each card you send?  Do you do the family update newsletter en masse to send with each card?  Or are you a "Best Wishes, Jane" type of gal?

And then we'd like to hear how your particular take on this debate makes you feel.  Do you put yourself under immense stress to get the cards in the post?  Or do you find it an easy, even joyful task?