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Your Christmas Calm Angels

November 10, 2008

What we want for You!

May Peace be your gift at Christmas
and your blessing all year through!


      
~Author Unknown

Peace_word

Peace - our wish for you.

The reason we write Save Our Sanity: The Christmas Calm Manual.

We want for you a stress-free festive season.

We want for you to find gift giving a joy. Not a chore.

We want for you to enjoy time spent with friends and loved-ones.

We want for you laughter-filled days, and the excitement of a young child's Christmas (whether or not there are young children in your life right now).

We want for you the meaning of the season - Peace. Joy. Goodwill to All.

You deserve it.

 

November 30, 2007

Sometimes Tradition isn't all it's cracked up to be!

Do you find Christmas whirls around quicker and quicker every year?

Sometimes it seems like you've barely caught your breath and it's Christmas again!

And sometimes, the whirling can mean we just pick up the same old  habits and traditions from last year, the year before, and even several decades ago!

My year has whirled this year.

Engagement_ringThe week before Christmas last year, our son Lovable Geek and his girlfriend Miss GG announced their engagement. 

We were having a massive Christmas last year - all four generations of my family gathering for the first time. 

I remember being excited at the engagement, but ever so slightly frustrated at having to refocus on engagements, when I had so much to think about at Christmas!   (Alright!  So I'm not a perfect mother!  At least I'm honest!)

This year has been the Year of the Wedding.  So, the year has flown!  And the wedding was last week. 

So here we are with a very different Christmas coming up.  Two of our three sons live interstate.  Having just been visiting for the wedding, they won't be able to return here for Christmas.  They've both followed lovely ladies to opposite sides of the continent from us now! So they're starting up new lives and traditions or picking up another family's influences and traditions.

Some humans can be so comforted by traditions that they can forget that they are not necessarily sacred. 

All old traditions were new once! 

They all had a starting point.  They were all created because someone had a need to do something a certain way.  Perhaps it was even a need to do it differently from something that had been familiar for many years.

In other words traditions are there for use until there time is up,  and then you create new ones to suit the new occasion.

Traditions are meant to evolve!

Rituals are symbolic gestures to mark important occasions and people.  But rituals and traditions have structures that can be twisted, tweaked or even discarded once they reach their use-by date.

Hot_xmas_dinnerAt Christmas time we tend to be steeped in traditions and habits - many of them WELL past their use-by date!

The classic example in Australia is the rich warm winter-comfort food of roasts, baked veges, and plum puddings. 

Those dishes were ideally suited to European Christmases, but are SO unsuited to our own hotBeach_picnic_2 Aussie Christmas.  We live in a world where fresh produce abounds and seafoods and picnics/barbecues are standard fare for our summers! 

So why maintain the tradition?  Usually because someone is scared of change, and protests so loudly, like any good squeaky wheel, until attention is paid to their desires.  Often that person isn't the one sweating over the hot stove in a hot kitchen on a hot summer's day! 

Traditions are often a cause of as much stress for some as they are a comfort for others.

Who deserves to have their say more?  Hmm!  Bears thinking about, doesn't it?

So what traditions do you have at Christmas that are passed their Use-By Date?  What are YOU going to do about them?


January 08, 2007

End of Festive Season Wrap-Up

Christmas_choc_and_champs The last of the tinsel has been tucked safely away for another year.  The cake has been eaten, the champagne all downed... and all through the house, not a wrapped present to be found. 

New Year has rung her bell... we've reviewed, and we're happy with Christmas 2006.  Well, mostly.

For those special people who purchased SOXS (or won it!), we'd like to say a huge thanks & we sincerely hope your festive season was Joyous and Sane and Saved...

For those in our community who supported us, and helped to promote SOXS, we'd like to again express our neverending thanks.  You've helped make it a success!

Now - here's our challenge.  We're reviewing SOXS, the good, the bad AND the ugly, this week and we'd love your input.  PLEASE either leave a comment here, or email us at SaveXmas@gmail.com - and let us know:

  • what worked for you, what didn't
  • what you found most valuable
  • what you REALLY wanted to see more of
  • why you purchased SOXS (and whether it lived up to your expectations)
  • OR, why you did not purchase SOXS
  • what you feel we could do differently next time

Please, we beg of you.... we're down on our knees asking for your input.  (And with Chris' dodgy, bionic knee, we're talking major strain!!)  Let us know.  Now?

We will be putting this blog and website into hiatus, like the Christmas decorations, until September 2007.  If you'd like to know when we're back on air, please hit the subscribe buttom up the top of this page, and you'll automatically be sent all updates to this page later in the year.

Wishing you a fabulous 2007!  Full of energy and excitement.

December 27, 2006

Saving MY Sanity At Christmas - Karen's Post Christmas Review

J0409250 It's all over for another year. December 25th came upon us, and, just as fast, left! 

How did YOUR Christmas go?

I catered for 14 people for Christmas Lunch, and it all went smoothly - there was plenty of food, praise abounded (yes, I loooove praise for a job well done...:), gifts were all opened and well received, Santa was good to us all, and there is still turkey and ham left overs for the post-Christmas meals...

On Boxing Day, we slept in (an unheard of luxury), and then G and I spent the early part of the day in discussions about my new project looming large to replace Sanctuary - a lot of clarity came out of that.  Then the afternoon was spent watching Ice Age 2 and playing Cluedo with the kids, assembling a telescope, and enjoying the rain (yay!!!  Rain! the BEST Christmas present of all in our drought stricken area!!)... a nice relaxing day.

So today, I have taken a little time to do a review of my own on Christmas, on what worked, what I'd do differently next year, and what I wouldn't do at all. For there is no time like the days following Christmas to plan the next one.

If we leave it until October to start planning Christmas 2007, that amnesia of time will have set in.  You're likely to forget the things you really wanted to remember.  And to blow out of proportion some other memories...

There is nothing like doing a review of this Christmas, and planning next Christmas RIGHT NOW! Grab a pen and your copy of SOXS, and start writing a letter to yourself NOW.  TODAY.  Don't put it off...  When you're done, file it in your SOXS Sanity Saver so that you have a great reference tool for next year. You'll be so glad you did when October rolls around...

In my review, the main thing I want to remember for next year is that there were things on my list that I didn't do. For each thing I didn't do - I chose consciously NOT to do it... not to spend my valuable time and energy on that rather than on something else.  I determined my priorities and decided that these things weren't worth the time and certainly weren't worth me getting all hot and bothered over.

In years past, I was very perfectionistic about Christmas. I have always loved Christmas, but this has led to an unhealthy tendency to get it right at any cost.  And usually that cost has been my cool.  It goes out the window somewhere in the lead up... and isn't found again until it's all over.   Not good.

This year, I remained cool, calm and in control the whole time. Lunch at my house for 14 people went off without a hitch. No-one lost their cool, including (most importantly) me. And no-one missed the things I didn't do.  No-one but me even realised they weren't done.

So, in my letter to myself for Christmas 2007, first on my list is - Don't be a perfectionistRemember what you didn't do last year, and how good it felt to be calm, and not lose your cool. By not aiming for the 'perfect' Christmas experience, it was somehow more relaxed, and a happier time for everyone.

What do you want to remind yourself of, in about 10 months time?  Write it down today!

Oh, and while you're thinking about it, please pop over and read what Rosa Say had to say over a Joyful, Jubilant Learning about her post-Christmas Review - Dear Me, from Me... she's leaving a reminder for herself in Outlook with a link to her review, so she remembers to read it.  Great tip - Rosa, I'm going to do that too!

December 16, 2006

A time of peace

Camera_downloads_254Out of the strain of the doing, into the peace of the done.

- Julia Louis Woodruff

I received an email today, from David Allen the GTD guru - with that quote in it.  I loved it so much, I just had to share it with you.

It's Saturday, which means it's nine days till Christmas, and I am feeling quite productive!

I have organised a couple of last-minute gifts - by buying gift memberships to Slim Ink.

I have written the last of the Christmas cards.

I have baked a double batch of my great-grandmother's divine shortbread (she was Scottish), yes - it's in my blood even though I wasn't born a Wallace. I think I was meant to marry a man with a Scot name!!!

I have even wrapped a few more presents, including the very last one I need to post.

I am feeling that peace that only comes when things are DONE.

[PS That is a photo of our tree - the one Gorgeous Girl put up and decorated on December 1.]

How're YOU doing?

Are you calm and peaceful and enjoying the season?

What's got to change so you can feel the 'peace of the done'?

December 15, 2006

A beautiful story to make your heart sing

Xmas_starsI'm not in the habit of forwarding those emails on that have a threat or a promise at the end ... but this story gave me more than goosebumps, and I felt it was a fitting reminder to us all of the beauty to be found in others... (a belief that may be slightly lacking if you've been battling Christmas shopping crowds and car-parking nightmares this week.)

Warning - tissues required...

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: "When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?"

The audience was stilled by the query. 

The father continued. "I believe, that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child."

Then he told the following story: 

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, "Do you think they'll let me play?" Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, "We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning." 

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. His Father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. 

The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, "Shay, run to first! Run to first!" Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled. 

Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second!" Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball ... the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, "Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay" 

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third! Shay, run to third!"

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, "Shay, run home! Run home!" Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team. 

"That day", said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world".

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day! 

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.

May your day be a Shay Day

December 08, 2006

Less is more in December!

J0400171_1 Lovely Dionna has a point.

Over at her blog, Using My Voice, Dionna Sanchez has written a beautiful post on Less Is More.

She talks about how full our lives get at this time of year, and the additional pressures we have heaped upon us just when we are meant to be enjoying the whole season of Christmas.

Just when you start to get in the mood to listen to Christmas music, put up your tree, and get gifts -- before you know it things seem to get a little out-of-hand. The time you want to spend soaking up the feeling of the Holidays is cast aside as you frantically try to find the time to squish everything in.

Oh, Dionna, we hear you!  Is this really what we want from December?  The craziness, the big-ness, the expectations and the guilt??  [Yes, I know, we've said it before, but Dionna puts it so well, and I love her perspective! - Especially about the expectations from school.  I'm not even going to go there right now, cause it's a bit of a sore point with me today]

Why is it that everyone feels the need to do so much at Christmas-time?? How about doing less - which will mean more in our hearts?

How can we do less?  What can you cut from your list?

Let's stop demanding so much from one another and start giving a little "time" back to the family -- where it belongs.

Because sometimes less is more.

Here, here!  Bravo Dionna.  Sometimes less really IS more.  Click on over and read her full post, it's guaranteed to get you thinking.

December 06, 2006

Warning! Absolutely Gorgeous Goosebumps Ahead from our other winner.

Christmas Eve was my first kiss,
With a man whose given me eternal bliss.
The man, now known as my hubby,
Made that Christmas positivley lovely!!
Two kids and a mortgage down the track,
I still get goosebumps thinking back,
To that kiss, that man, that christmas night,
A moment in time, that made me his wife!

                                The_kiss








________________________________________________________________________________________

With the two biggest Romantics known to Oz reading competition entries, the GOOSEBUMPS we got from this one did it for us!!!  This so wonderfully captured the "magic" we'd love to see you all making space to enjoy by Saving Your Xmas Sanity.  This sweet poem totally captured "what every girl dreams of".  Congratulations Anita!

"Picture This" from one of our winners

Picture this...

Townsville (North Queensland) Christmas Eve 1971.  I am only young (ok I'm 7).

Like every child I am so excited about this Christmas Day,  the two preceeding Christmas Days were very sad because my dad had died just before Christmas in 1969, and I was still adjusting to his loss.

But this year its going to be different, it was going to be special.

Mum is on a widow's pension and money is tight, but I know she bought me one really great present, I saw the big box!

Then suddenly comes the shrill sound most northern Australian children dread - the cyclone alert blasts from the TV.  There is a cyclone coming...

Oh well, most of them never go near us.

But this one "Althea" was different.

Not only did she come, but she hit Townsville full on, a catagory 3.  Remember we're talking 1971, so the town didn't have adequate safety, like pins and bolts, and things kids know nothing of.

All we know is our house is half gone. Our fridge is dead.  And everything is a mess.

White_christmasChristmas Day and Mum and I are just sitting there looking at it all, and then she pulls out my present (it did survive).

It was a little colourful keyboard that was popular back then.  I was thrilled!  Only problem was the batteries that were to go in it, were in the torch and other items of "need", so I sat there on Christmas Day wondering just how much worse things could possibly get. 

We ate a sandwich for Christmas lunch.  I had a keyboard I couldn't play and no batteries to be bought anywhere.  The roof was half off the house. 

And just me and Mum alone...

My children today ask me why I am always quiet at Christmas time and sometimes I shed a tear or two.

I try to explain that between their Grandad dying just before Christmas in 1969, and Cyclone Althea, I have never viewed Christmas in the same light.  The "magic", as they say, has gone for me.

But I do get joy out of their smiles and laughs as they open their Christmas presents with excitement and wonder, for Christmas is truly for children.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Now do you see why we couldn't resist this haunting evocative story as a winner for our competition?  We felt so honoured to be allowed to share in Annette's vulnerability in sharing this story.  I'm sure it will resonate with readers who know all too painfully that Christmas can be a sad and difficult time and grief can pervade our lives in so many big and little ways. 

We want to thank Annette for reminding us all how important the PEOPLE are at Christmas.  As Richard Carlson would say Dont Sweat the Small Stuff.

December 05, 2006

Christmas Decorating - oh, the pressure!

Christmas_day I was reading a women's magazine a couple of weeks ago - a Family Circle, or something similar - and was horrified to read 'Dont forget to put up your tree on December 1'! 

My first reaction was a knee-jerk 'Says Who?'

This militant - do it this way, it's the proper/right/traditional way or else you'll be... (name your poison... a bad mother?  An incompetent homemaker?) is totally inappropriate! 

Before we go any further, though, I have a confession to make.  Our Christmas tree DID go up on Friday, December 1st.  But not by me.  And not because that was the date the magazines said we should.  I was out taking my boys for a haircut, and playing taxi (one of my all time favourite ways to spend Friday afternoon:), and when I got home Gorgeous Girl had dug her way into the dark recesses of our store room, located the tree and all the boxes of decorations, and had the tree up, the lights on and was starting on the baubles! 

I was thrilled!  I love Christmas decorations, but when I am short of time it's really the last thing I have energy for.  But, being only 13, she enjoyed every minute of it - especially without her brothers around to annoy her I suspect.

(oh, and being a 13 year old, of course, the contents of the store room were all scattered in the hallway, making it hard to walk into the house - but we managed to rectify that pretty quickly later that evening:)

But, back to my initial premise.  The reason Chris and I put SOXS together was first and foremost to try and relieve the pressure so many people feel around Christmas.  That whole raft of expectations that we, and our loved ones, have around the festive season.  Aided and abetted no-end by the media, and the shops.  We've been brainwashed into believing that Christmas is all about piles of presents and huge turkeys and decorations that go up on December 1 and come down on January 6.  And all that goes along with that (I'm not even mentioning the shopping!)

But, really, that isn't it at all - is it?

Sure all that stuff is nice.  But not at the expense of our sanity.  Of our peace of mind.  Of time with our families. 

Sometimes we're so busy doing what the magazines tell us we 'should' be doing that we forget what it is we really want, and what the real purpose of this beautiful time of year is.

I'd like to take a little time (yes, a 'little' time is probably all you have, isn't it?) and think about what it is that makes the festive season, and Christmas, so very special to you, personally.

Then, go the next step and ask - is this what I have been planning on doing this Christmas?

If the answer is No then what are you going to do about it?  It's NOT too late.  There are still more than 20 days until December 25.  What's going to be different this year?

If you'd like additional help - well, that's why we developed SOXS.  Pop on over and grab YOUR copy today!